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The list (a loving suggestion when rising from the ashes)


I felt like I had lost everything I was, and every good part that I once had in my life. If I still had some of them, I had lost touch to them. I was lost. How should I start to find my way again ? Who was I ? What did I want in my life ?
I did something.. I wrote a list, a list of big and smaller things, the tiniest things to remember, I guess we could call them "feel-good and finding your way to your own life things ".  I wrote it at my parents summer place, just a week after I left him.
The list included everything from examples of new hobbies, friends to reconnect and get in touch with, new methods to positive thinking  and those small moments that you need to remember to take for yourself.

Here is an example of what it looked like:

- Become a member of your Student Nation/ Organisation
- Redecorate your apartment (get rid of old bed, refurnish, make it yours)
- Ask how N is doing, visit her back home ?
- Remember to be your own best friend
- Catch up with J, over a cup of Tea ?
- Do something fun with a friend. Go see a movie ?
- go to student parties and happenings
- Remember to go Bollywood dancing
- Start a new hobby, what could that be ?
- Lay on the floor and laugh (reconnect with your silly you <3)
- Go out for a run
- Remember to dream--> Do a map on your future dreams
- Bake something (cookies ?)
- Write a song (or just blur out words on a piece of paper :) )
-  Take part of a handcraft/jewelry making class
- Take a cup of tea and relax by the window (one of my favorite places today by the way :) ! )
- Allow yourself to cry and be there for you. (it is also strength)
- Girls Night (and Cooking and wine ?)
- paint your nails (or start by trying to learn to do it)
- make a list of good books to read and then read them

A list like this might seem a bit weird, but personally it helped me a lot. It was a stepping stone and a good ground to stand on. It kept me together and helped me to look forward. The order was not important as long as I did 1 (one) thing everyday.

And no, the point is not to have to do or learn everything. I took about 6 months for me to get comfortable to even go to  any of the social happenings at the Student Nation even though I went there and became a member immediately, The dancing came back slowly and then sometimes more or less and I still do not know how to paint my nails without coloring everything but the nails. But I do it when I feel like it, and I learn to laugh to my silly mistakes.

The point is, start doing What Makes You Happy
So if you ever feel lost from You, your own life and from those good people in it. This might be something you could try to find your way.

Stay Strong, Always <3
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