Roar in the Afterglow

When dealt with so many downfalls in the past it is easy for us to take on the shield of doubt for everything new that comes along. I know that worry, the armor, way to well. Talking with a girlfriend of mine, who has been out there far longer, searching, putting herself out there, listened and then been taken along for the dance, made me once again realize how common this feeling tends to be. He went a bit silent, and your'e sure that sooner or later a message will show up "There's something I have to tell you...." He said something nice, and there you are preparing yourself for "Listen, This/You have been great but..."  Everything goes well, maybe a bit too well, and all you can think of is " I'm sure something heartbreaking will happen soon". For all we know they could suddenly disappear, and what he actually was up too, we would never get to hear from him.  We lost our naivety but picked up something bound to protect us, sometimes I ...

Fall in love with the feeling of real, of being right where you stand, visible, heard, here. Recognize when You are a part of  a dialog you are invited to. Recognize when you feel whole, Recognize when you get to stay this way, when no one makes your self loose touch. I promised myself a long time ago to never fall for what I could feel was sinking me, but about a year ago, there I went again, listened, got lost, listened again, but not to myself. He could not see me since the fence of himself was too high, he only saw him, and I could feel me being left behind. I remember a time inside a gallery on a summer sunny day. I ran out to the window with the biggest view of the open sea and I remember saying now that is what real art is to me. Some weeks later, when I was still trying to understand  his ways, I could feel myself not being in touch with where and who I am. I felt an urge to run out to the sea. I took of my shoes and stood in the waves, he called me crazy, I laughed...