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Holding on to Doubt


When dealt with so many downfalls in the past it is easy for us to take on the shield of doubt for everything new that comes along. I know that worry, the armor, way to well. Talking with a girlfriend of mine, who has been out there far longer, searching, putting herself out there, listened and then been taken along for the dance, made me once again realize how common this feeling tends to be.

He went a bit silent, and your'e sure that sooner or later a message will show up "There's something I have to tell you...."
He said something nice, and there you are preparing yourself for "Listen, This/You have been great but..." 
Everything goes well, maybe a bit too well, and all you can think of is " I'm sure something heartbreaking will happen soon".
For all we know they could suddenly disappear, and what he actually was up too, we would never get to hear from him. 

We lost our naivety but picked up something bound to protect us, sometimes I wonder how much it really helps us, and how much it actually causes pain. Is there a chance that we are missing out on  the happiness of everything good, when concentrating on the expected bad ?

When hoping for the best and preparing for the worst (a life surviving tool I for sure have internalized), are we sometimes in the risk of just preparing ?

I guess what I am trying to say is, We should not be afraid to give it a little more belief, at least when everything seems to point into a good direction. Open up your heart to all the love, It might get you stricken, but holding up your armor so high, could lead you to mistaken a marshmallow camping stick, for a blade that is coming right at you smoothly but quick.


Lower your shield, but approach with care, be present in the moment with all that is there.



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