Roar in the Afterglow

For a few years now I have wanted to live in a tiny house on wheels;           a mobile, ecological, minimalist grandmas cottage. Big windows, wooden floors, natural and warm yet bright surfaces,with pops of color (sunflower yellow kitchen cabinets, turquoise tiles or a single tea-pot) and Moroccan and Scottish throws and pillows. A spacious bedroom loft with a window in the ceiling, a small and not too heavy fireplace to keep the house warm during the winter (or just to boil tea and that cozy factor), a tiny wooden sauna room at the back with an inbuilt shower and half of a giant whisky barrel which could serve both as a sauna seat and bath tub. Storage space under the stairs (my goal is to have as little "stuff" as possible), a dinner table that comes up from the floor when needed, a couch/storage by the window. Wheels underneath to get to new exciting locations when needed (for work, other responsibilities or due to climate change), a few wooden fold box...

Ever witnessed mistreatment, or heard words that made you turn your head ?  Ever walked on as if what you witnessed was something normal- pretending like it never happened- that it is not up to you to stand up to what was being said ? Do you ever think who else might have heard it, who might hear it again-by the end of this day ? How they thought that it is accepted- to be talked to this way.  Have you ever thought who`s business it is to teach our youngsters not to call each-other names, have you ever let it continue, blaming the parents for their ways ? It is not our place to interfere, it is not our problem so why should we care, and god forbid- if we decided to say something- what if someone stared ? But what if we could change the current, help the river shift its stream ? What if we could end a vicious cycle even if it was "just a badmouthed kid who does not understand what it means".  What if we could change a life, or even just a day ? What if this ...

Solo-travel and exploring on your own often seems to be something that is considered too big of  an hurdle, an  uncomfortable area we would rather avoid. As wolves we are more comfortable in a pack. I used to think like this myself. The thing is however, that we often (as singles in a busy world) find ourselves alone when we would have the time for an adventure. Schedules do not fit.  - Then there are of-course the differences in interests as well, and as being without a partner no one is  "obligated" (please take with sarcasm :D) to go with you on your holiday to extraordinary locations and events.  But hey, that being said; - what a perfect time for you to do exactly what you always dreamed of ! All I want to say is go for it.   Do not sit around waiting for "maybe another time" due to the fear, and I am not talking about the fear of being scared that something might happen on the way (that does not seem to be the first thing that pop...

With the smelly bag on my back I was almost homeless yesterday, I came from the camp where I worked and will continue on Monday, I had not booked a hostel and didn't know where would stay, I took a shot and headed towards Earls Court to first find a Cafe. With the same clothes I slept in inside a cold tent, 3 warm blouses and pants with mud, I felt so out of place for London Central, I decided to avoid South Kensington, would probably have given a posh lady a heart attack. Luckily for me just around the corner I found A place, and now I`m staying here at Earls Court for another 3 days. The not having a home to go to, being a bit lost and out of place, made me feel quite lonely, and I miss home even more these days. It made me think of the homeless, that we all deserve a warm bed, to be on foot is tiring, a home base makes you feel safe. But for me this is just another adventure, compared to them this is a choice, and soon I will be home again. But back to back...

Travel alone, it does not have to be far, but by throwing yourself in there you always immerse in something new, You rely on You and grow through each turn you decide to take. You meet new people and through that shyness a braver you breaks. This journey makes me stronger for me, for her who needed someone and for you who I`m yet to meet.  So until then, let us grow,  and then tell me all the stories,  there is so much I want you to know

The name of this blog is taken out of two different songs that keep me going, while there are many, as you may have seen on my playlist, these two sum up that whats most important. I wanted to write down the part of the lyrics that mean the most but also share the songs for you to listen in case you had not heard them before. The first one is "Roar" by Katy Perry which I guess that many of you have heard before. I am going to let the following lyrics speak for itself. I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath Scared to rock the boat and make a mess So I sat quietly, agreed politely I guess that I forgot I had a choice I let you push me past the breaking point I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything You held me down, but I got up Already brushing off the dust You hear my voice, your hear that sound Like thunder, gonna shake your ground You held me down, but I got up Get ready 'cause I've had enough I see it all, I see it now ...

Thank You for dragging me down, because now the only way is up. Thank You for humiliating me, because I have learned to see my own beauty Thank You for showing me, because now I know what kind of future I want to have Thank You for almost taking away my breath, because now I breathe more then ever Thank You for pushing me into fear, because now I know that I am brave Thank You for making me feel hopeless, because all I seem to feel is light Thank You for making me break the silence, for now I know my own Strength. 

What do I think you should look for in a person ? . . Choose someone who will love you for who you are, who supports you, encourages you and hugs you often. Choose someone you can share your troubles with if you wanted too.  (sometimes we do not want unload on to them all that we are carrying) ... just knowing that you can gives you a feeling of calm.  Choose someone who will love you know matter what size or shape, as long as you are happy, that is all that should matter.  Choose someone who will not laugh At you, but With you.   Choose someone who loves and admires you for your strength. Choose someone who will be there to catch you if you fall.   Choose someone who hold your hand when you need it.  Choose someone who encourages and support you to reach for you dreams.    

I walked down the street today, not feeling my exactly prettiest.. my make-up was put on in a hurry and my hair had tangled up once again (it tends to do that a lot). As I thought about my messy appearance I remembered one of the best things my dad has ever taught me;  -The most beautiful make-up you could have is your smile. I count to that a sense of inner happiness. To appreciate who you are, inside and out. My parents have taught me a lot. My teenage self might not have understood or paid attention to the little things, but the years have opened up my eyes to the things that matter.  My parents have taught me that friends matter, as I was younger we had all kinds of parties and get-together with our family friends.The parents and all their kids.We even traveled up north during the winter to ski, daytime hike, ride reindeers (we even got our drivers license) and play board-games like Pictionary and make pancakes in the evening.  You can maybe imagine what a bi...

I felt like I had lost everything I was, and every good part that I once had in my life. If I still had some of them, I had lost touch to them. I was lost. How should I start to find my way again ? Who was I ? What did I want in my life ? I did something.. I wrote a list, a list of big and smaller things, the tiniest things to remember, I guess we could call them "feel-good and finding your way to your own life things ".  I wrote it at my parents summer place, just a week after I left him. The list included everything from examples of new hobbies, friends to reconnect and get in touch with, new methods to positive thinking  and those small moments that you need to remember to take for yourself. Here is an example of what it looked like: - Become a member of your Student Nation/ Organisation - Redecorate your apartment (get rid of old bed, refurnish, make it yours) - Ask how N is doing, visit her back home ? - Remember to be your own best friend - Catch up with J,...

Love, Closeness... It is a very private subject.. and we rarely talk about it (at least this openly) But I wanted to, it is important, at least to me. As much as this is the important one.. it`s also the most difficult one.. luckily I just had a glass of wine with my friend, I thought about If I should write this down now or another time, but since it is such an emotional subject I decided to give it a go right now, maybe that one glass of wine just might make me more relaxed.. So...   For me it is a glance and the smile on your face  the touch of your hands, And an honest embrace For where I lay it is you I keep, This changing world I fall asleep Those are some of the words in Vanessa Carltons song Home , that song means a lot to me, and I am listening to it as I write this down. Simply said every single part of this song makes me feel safe and it is that feeling that I hope to have and share with that right someone there somewhere in the future. Choose someo...

If I Just. .Sound familiar?.. that is a thought I remember having often.  All I wanted was for us to have a good life, a healthy relationship and a good or at least manageable future. Things were falling a part and I was desperately trying to keep them from falling, everyday and more than I ever concentrated on my own things.   There was worry about him passing his courses,  getting him to apply for summer jobs (which even according to his grandparents became my responsibility.) and writing a CV, getting him to take care of his economy that directly influenced ours (or when he wanted to invest his money on gold bricks and old computer parts that then laid around our apartment and enhanced my asthma ), taking care of our home and before that his mom`s (where cooking pots were dished and stored in the bathtub), his refusal to deal with his drinking problems, our relationship, the way he treated me and so on. If here and now did not work, than what would our fu...

Ever been in a situation where you gave all of your energy and ended up losing yourself and your belief in your own self-worth? Ever been through that emotional rush, when you, despite the fear of being to much of a wreck for someone else to love (ever) make that life changing decision to finally say "NO, No more. Life is beautiful. I deserve better than this ! " ? I have; After four years of riding the roller coaster of an emotionally abusive relationship, that started when I was 17, I have had enough. My knees where shaking, But I stood up. And every day, no matter what I am going through, I am thankful for that what felt like a fight for my last gasp of air, but what turned to a roar for life, love and everything that makes the world beautiful. From that moment on I Roar in the Afterglow. This is a blog about life and learning from it, love, dating, single life and the things in a relationship that matter the most, positive thinking, always remembering yo...