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Go - Do it for You (about the fear of solo-travel, not about crossing the Serengeti)



Solo-travel and exploring on your own often seems to be something that is considered too big of  an hurdle, an uncomfortable area we would rather avoid. As wolves we are more comfortable in a pack. I used to think like this myself. The thing is however, that we often (as singles in a busy world) find ourselves alone when we would have the time for an adventure. Schedules do not fit. 

- Then there are of-course the differences in interests as well, and as being without a partner no one is "obligated" (please take with sarcasm :D) to go with you on your holiday to extraordinary locations and events. 
But hey, that being said;
- what a perfect time for you to do exactly what you always dreamed of !

All I want to say is go for it.  

Do not sit around waiting for "maybe another time" due to the fear, and I am not talking about the fear of being scared that something might happen on the way (that does not seem to be the first thing that pops into mind when people hear the "why don`t you go on your own ?" question), unless we are planning on crossing the Serengeti at night with meatloaf as our packed lunch.. which probably would not be that safe anyway, but of the fear of awkwardness of being a solo traveler (and bump into couples) or being hit by waves of loneliness. 

Life is short, too short not to do things we always dreamed of, too short to let things like this type of fear stand in our way. 

So get out there, whether it is a concert or a trip around the globe,  and enjoy your life while it is here. 

Yes the waves of loneliness will come, you can bet on it. Mine came right as I sat myself on the underground heading towards the bus station. But these waves will fade if you allow yourself to see the beauty in doing this, doing it for You. And for times when they don't.. and they only end up growing stronger, you can always ride them. Meet and greet it as it is, explore it further and get to know You. 

Another word for alone is by yourself; with ourselves as our companion. Is it not ironic that the one person that will be with us through our entire life, the one that should be our very best friend, is the one we are so afraid of spending time with ? That they are the one we would not go on adventures with ? That they are the one whos company we are trying to avoid ?

And then there is that worry of the awkwardness, the fear of it as well as the fear of us being presumed as sad, or is it really just our own judgment we are afraid of ? Seeing other couples might be difficult when you are there on your own, same goes for bumping into a group of friends. 

I felt this way when I went to spend time at the beach, when I walked the streets of Amsterdam exploring- on my 25th birthday, and this week when I climbed and rambled the hills of the Atlantic coastal path and met all the couples on the way. 

Something like a singles room at an hotel or a table for one - can be scary, especially when you are worried that this is now the first official step towards life as an old maid (both from your own point of view and others). Do not worry, it is not- and in the end of the day, like with the other situations, it is all about perspective. We choose the lens we see through. And if you feel like the only single traveler without a travelling crew of friends (like in those fun adds on TV) -  remember that there are lots of us out there, but not everyone of us have the same guts. See your strength in being capable.

Once you set your mind on going on a solo adventure, big or small, and especially once you are out there, remember that one thing that often seems to slip our minds (applies to Ms Author too); 
- Who you are doing it for. 

As singles - with that someone on our minds (or just potential pursuers, crushes..people our mind can not let go of)- we might be thinking about how the journey could gain someones attention. How the will see our social media posts or sudden drop in messages, and start seeing us like busy, independent and interesting. How they might start to gain interest in us as they see how much better we are without them..

Do not expect attention. Do not sit around thinking of your next move with them on your mind, do not sit around waiting for a reaction. Do not waist your journey on thoughts like this. Channel your emotions towards who the adventure is for. You. 

But back to exploring.. it does not have to be far, just start by going somewhere new but close to where you live, or a bit further to a place that is already familiar to you, maybe this can lower the mental barrier of going on your own.

Once you go, you will know why you needed to, and you will thank yourself for not letting time, breathless moments or beatings of your heart slip away.

In the end of the day you are the one you live for, and you are the one you will always live with,
So what are you waiting for ?

Help yourself see your own strength, learn to trust yourself. Grow whole. Be your own best friend. Learn to enjoy your company.



Make a plan...and

Go <3 

Do it for you










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