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What do I want ?


He asked me what I want, so here it is;

I want giggles, maybe on a rooftop. Because out in the open with the stars right above me I can breathe. I want a sudden Irish pub, a band, my excitement- from my heart to my feet.

I want that cheers and long nights, unforgettable moments, that are shared with friends. I want you right there beside me, time and time again.

I want a spontanious coffee or a street-food stroll. I want comedy night or a song that without walking into that place- that exact time- neither of us would have ever known.

I want to know you- you in real life, outside four consistent walls. I want to explore this life with you, without you, find the ground for my feet.The one big thing here is, that I never again want to miss a beat.

Take away, Netflix, convinient hours and chill- a protentious dinner at an uncomfortably protentious restaurant is not my thing. I need true effort, on a personal level- then and only then will my heart and mind truly say ´pling´.

I need you to make that time, I need to know that Im more than just a girl you see once in a while. Find out what makes me smile.

Respond when I text- don't leave it till next week. even if you wouldn't know all you wanted to say- say something, don't leave me hanging. it's poison, that's another thing. Anxiety of the unknown- with that I'm struggeling. It hurts even before I met you- it´s an expected torture, for once be the guy who communicates fully. just saying.

I wish you would ask me to tell you when I got home safely. I always wonder that about you. And reply when I tell you that I made it home too. Hold my hand when crossing the road, and do it safely- I'm scared of cars and traffic, slightly blind too. This little gesture helps me trust in you.

I don't want flowers, a song or box of chocolate or corny movie nights. That said I wouldn't argue against it- once it could be just right.

But what I truly want is time and effort, no matter how busy you are- even the smallest spontanious gesture could take it far. Pop into the pub when Im on shift- as a surprise, that runs in my daydream movie. Most likely the scene happens when I'm feeling quite gloomy.

Show me that your'e not affraid, put just as much down on our plate. Don't kiss me before you mean it and spare your sweet words. Show me that your'e here as a friend, not as a potential 3 month fling buffet splurge.

I want to dance with you- even when were not moving. I want to get to know you in  this world- and who knows, maybe one day through these adventures a mutual story could start blooming.

This is what I want; time and effort, friendsship and care. Spiced with life's rythms and a man who is there.




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