I wanted to stop myself for a second, write down about the life I want and strive to work for, I am sure I have written about this in the past but once in a while it is good to take a rein-check.
If you want to read about the feelings I want to carry in that life/or with someone you can read
But this post is more about the practical steps and decisions, as in when, were and how ? And what about money and career.
First of all I have a long time ago realized that the 9-5 and weekends off, plus occasional trips to the Spain when a bit of culture, sun and pool is needed, is not for me.
I am longing for the unconventional. The out of the box, the unknown. Life is too short, the world is too remarkable and you are too precious to confide to a life of 'stay put because what if in 20 years..' I choose to turn around the worry this way.. if your heart desires to explore.. what will you be able to tell it 20 years from now ?
I follow my late grandpas footsteps, a forever explorer (priest, adventurer, project worker and sailor). I also have plenty of globally minded family friends who work with everything from garbage collection/truck driving, nursing, flight attendant, sailor, teaching, NGO peace-projects to being an ambassador and an ever adventuring godfather who has sailed around the world a few times, chooses to rent, owns a cottage and is about to row the Atlantic ocean as reference. There are many ways to build an international lifestyle. You can live your life "3 years here, 3 years there" or something of a more mixed divide, this especially if you as a couple juggle with two home-countries. You can rent out your house and travel for a year. You can live on a sailing boat (if you know how to sail). You can live months apart in order to let the your partner for-fill their dream that is elsewhere then where you are currently residing. Anything is possible, and you can put together your puzzle pieces. Neither is it only possible if you have lots of money, but of-course easier if you can send your kids to a school without fees (hurray for Finland !). More on that later.
So, first of all covid; lockdown, border close and the uncertain job-market, does not leave you much wiggle room does it. But until it is resolved, stay where you are. Focus on self-growth and anything you can do where you are right now. And know that one day you can 'be free' again.
So what is my current future plan- is there one ?
I want to use the next 1-2 years to further my knowledge in bookselling, and literature over all. I am possibly signing up to a 13 month professional course, both out of true interest but also because I might as well make some use out of this time when staying put is the only option. I am also staying in touch with a local literary agent who is looking for occasional assistance once funding makes its way back to the field of culture. I am starting my therapy journey to research my possible anxiety disorder and work through my traumas (becoming better for myself and those around me). I am also looking into getting my drivers license maybe within 2021.
But what then, what does my life look like after a vaccine is found and covid-19 comes to an end (if it does ?). What does my life look like- if it was only up to me ?
I imagine myself either moving abroad for another year- perhaps to Scotland, or Ireland, and then perhaps returning to Southern Finland and renting a flat somewhere closer to nature and the sea (Western Coast of Espoo ?), or jumping directly into buying a small simple house on the countryside, preferably close to the sea or a lake and within driving distance from the metropolitan (so Sipoo, Porvoo or Loviisa perhaps), or my own share (with a private garden) in a bigger commune. If mister right happens to be in my life- great, he can come too, we can get married. If he is foreign his family home or a flat in his home town could be our other basepoint, perhaps my house eventually ends up becoming the summer/vacation cottage, everything is up for a flexible negotiation.
Whatever happens I want to make sure that I can reach my dream and afford it on my own, I am saving up (always been good at that) and in a year I see myself having a full down-payment as well as money left for other things. That house will be my safe haven, my basepoint, I will live in that house continuously for a few years whilst working, and travel and hike in Europe during holidays, perhaps further. Once or If I have a family I would like to rent out the house and travel for a full 6 months or a year around the world, possibly work with a salary, or if savings allow it help out at different community and volunteer projects with on-site living. An educational year for all. I might do this without any kids as well.
I might do a house-swap a few times during my life, even with family, either for a year (if kids school exchange is possible) or just for the summer. I always wanted to experience living in a small Scottish coastal village, working at the local pub, a cultural venue, a book store, postal office, the harbor, a backpacker hostel and possibly herding sheep. Ireland, Iceland, Faroe Islands or Norway would also be places to consider. The French and Italian countryside or Greeke islands is also intreeging and even eclectic or exotic cities interest me - I would love to work at a Stand-up comedy or Spoken-Word venue for a year or two. I loved doing that in London. I do not care about luxury, but about being self-sustainable wherever possible. My goal is no longer to save money to have a mansion (won´t happen anyway) or to have a nice car and my own sailing boat (which I can`t sail anyway). Neither do I look forward to All-Inclusive holidays. I prefer to be on the road, the journey, the scenic views, the locals and "the gas-station, train-station and harbor in the middle of nowhere". I save up so that I can have that small house and live with more flexibility without turning to luxury.
One day-with all the experience I've gathered and I have to be settled for a few years anyway (like when the kids are starting to turn 16 and attend gymnasium ?) I might open up my own bookshop and cultural venue space, it could also be a cafe during daytime and pub/bar in the evening. Once I want my flexibility back again I could find myself a replacer or business partner who can take over while I set my feet abroad for a while.
Some pointers towards making this possible;
How to live an anxiety free unconventional lifestyle.
1. Accept that there will be waves of anxiety- learn to work through them wherever you are.
2. Accept and embrace the idea that life is not black and white. You can choose to re-build and explore new ideas every few years (or more often- it really is up to you)
3. Know and accept that life is unpredictable, but do not sit and guard the things that might happen (like parents getting older) whilst missing out on your own life- if an adventurous life is what you dream of. Know that if something happens and you have to be/or move to a certain place for a certain time you have the freedom and possibility to do so. See how changes are possible, do not be the slave of your own thinking or others ideals.
4. You decide if money really is a big factor and if it stands in the way of you living your dream.
5. Children make it a bit more tricky, but if you want them remember how much they will grow and learn.
No you do not have to be a lawyer or ambassador, or even an social media influencer to be able to live an unconventional life. Find a trade you are passionate about and have a back-up with lots of work opportunities wherever you are. Learn an additional language. Work more one year and less the next. Be flexible with the concept of your dream career and volá, the world is your oyster. Choose what you decide to live for- the experiences or the career ?
When it comes to money save some, and teach yourself suitable spending habits before you start to embrace your slightly nomadic lifestyle. Do you want the stuff or the adventure ? Iphones or a summer on unpaid leave herding sheep in the Shettlands ? A house for 400 000 € or one for 150 000 € , Another house abroad (spouses home-country ?) or are you open to House-swap when needed ? New furniture or simple recycled furniture ? A diamond ring or a simple engraved gold band ? Gym membership or outdoor activities ?
Make plane/travel tickets a necessary part of the money you manage to put aside, I currently save about 10 % for this lifestyle and 20 % towards that small house I´ve been dreaming of. Every month is another puzzle piece added.
It is also important for your well-being to stop thinking about big sums when it comes to your career (do not chase the money as a sole reason to live). If you however want to be at least slightly career orientated see the small progress instead of worrying about missing out on the big ones, change your perspective and be proud of what you have accomplished so far. Learn to live and appreciate a life based on smaller flexible and unpredictable accomplishments. I recently realized that I made 30 000 € in the world of books since starting my career change from scratch 3 years ago, this has involved a lot of internships, shorter jobs and my current job ( basically a life with flexibility, but also uncertainty). Sure- it is not much counted over 3 years, and yes I have in addition had other jobs on the side (pub, summer camps and care work) to carry me to a higher monthly income. And yes much has gone to rent and other everyday matters, but I have also traveled, lived in expensive London, changed career without paying for a degree, moved to expensive Helsinki, and been on covid furlough, and still saved around 10 000 € during these past 3 years alone. It is up to you how you choose to value you financial progress and what your dream career has given you- and is the dream a ladder-based career or your well-being.
It is all about perspective.
The Unconventional lifestyle is also not only for the nomads without permanent housing, the ones who are constantly changing scenery, It is a puzzle of exactly your own choosing.
Kids make it harder, but also rewarding:
It is true (I believe) that a global flexible lifestyle is easier without children, but that being said I do want some- so they will be apart of the plan. And there are tons of families doing this so I know it is possible. Schooling will work out if you take it into consideration. Basically if you decide to stay put in periods, for example ages 7-12, 12-15 and 16-18, you should get by without too much hassle. The teaching language or languages should be taken into consideration. Homeschool is an option too, but not something I would prefer.
I am also lucky enough to live in a country where education is free, even in university, so if thinking about money and college funds, I wouldn't have to worry to save up for that. If they wanted to go elsewhere to do their possible University degree I would support their choice and then see what possible financial support I could give them. Even just some pocket- money or a plane ticket home would be valuable.
All and all an international lifestyle with unconventional ways offers a unique upbringing with a wholesome picture of the world around us that we get to share to our offspring. Wise world citizens in the making.
That is all, for now.
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