Skip to main content

In a year


Do things feel like they are not going anywhere, like you are stomping your feet on the same piece of ground ? Has your heart just been broken ? Are you asking yourself; will I ever get over this.. does this pattern just repeat itself. I feel this way sometimes... stuck... in pain... in an emotional rut.. you name it....sniffling and incapable to see the light, although to be fair.. that light.. even in the darkest of times does, in small glimpses, a little here and there, make it through to reach my receptive self. But seeing the small pieces can sometimes be an exhausting process....in this piece I wanted to concentrate on something else, something bigger.

 The Magic in a Year.

 If you think back on last year.. how much has changed, how many bigger or minor heartbreaks have you concurred (and yes.. not still faced..) and how has your view on the world broadened ? How many adventures (some more sudden) has the past year taken you on ? How has your life changed within that year ?

 And yes, as in life, there are always those less positive changes... changes that we feared or never would have expected.. things that ripped our heart out.. but even through those hardships.. this year has thought us something, and a new day.. good or bad... is still a new day, and a fresh start. And with all that bad that can come against us at any moment, be grateful- and make the most of each day you have (or at least keep it in mind... I know how easily we just get glued with our but in-front of Netflix).

 When I think about the possibility in a year I try however to think about the endless positive possibilities. It makes me curious and opens my heart to all that what is yet to come. A year ago I was sitting on a cellar floor in Balham (South London), checking broken toys for pieces, from where I went to working with supporting elders, found this wonderful pub team (know some things about beer and can pour pints.. even at speed), a new hobby, first holiday abroad with a friend and went solo to a surfcamp.. I also managed to change my career for yet another path and now stepping on the first step of possibly landing a job in this world that still 6 months ago was for me a complete mystery.

 And as far as love goes.. I still have not met that guy.., I have however met and gotten over some less charming trolls, and just a year ago I had not met them either.. so... what new (and perhaps this time better) might a year from now bring ?

In a year from now I could have started my own book imprint (who knows ?) Firefly might take-off sooner then I could have dreamed.. one thing, one move or two..sometimes unknowingly.. might lead to another..). I could still be here, in this very room, or I could be on a journey of a lifetime. I could be back home.

 There can be so much that can happen in a year, 365 days counting, 
Who knows where we are once we get there ?




Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Unhinged

Forgive yourself, lets start with that.  Anxiety can (and will) at times make us act all out of whack I used to pray; do not do this to me again.  Whatever you do- do not let me stumble off towards the edge. But you will stumble, that is a fact, so forgive yourself for falling way off track.  Find those around you who agree to communicate- not say what they do not mean and then leave the truth unsaid-causing you to sprint towards the edge. The edge gave you answers, truths that were left unsaid. It extinguished the feeling of hopelessness.  The what ifs, whys and fear of losing the shots you do not take, the ticking construct of the little time that is left.  Tick-tock, knock-knock and you find yourself unhinged.  Tick-tock, knock-knock you realize the spin.  Tick-tock, knock-knock, mortification creeping in.  Deep breaths darling You are not mad Deep breaths darling The right people will want to understand Deep breaths darling I will hold your ha...
Post a Comment
Read more

My dream way of living; minimal housing, community, flexibility, nature, adventure

For a few years now I have wanted to live in a tiny house on wheels;           a mobile, ecological, minimalist grandmas cottage. Big windows, wooden floors, natural and warm yet bright surfaces,with pops of color (sunflower yellow kitchen cabinets, turquoise tiles or a single tea-pot) and Moroccan and Scottish throws and pillows. A spacious bedroom loft with a window in the ceiling, a small and not too heavy fireplace to keep the house warm during the winter (or just to boil tea and that cozy factor), a tiny wooden sauna room at the back with an inbuilt shower and half of a giant whisky barrel which could serve both as a sauna seat and bath tub. Storage space under the stairs (my goal is to have as little "stuff" as possible), a dinner table that comes up from the floor when needed, a couch/storage by the window. Wheels underneath to get to new exciting locations when needed (for work, other responsibilities or due to climate change), a few wooden fold box...
Post a Comment
Read more

Short texts on our tilting world

  Calling my bank back home in another European country to pass through SEPA payment for my public transport card here in the new but also safe and functional country where I despite the ever whispering inflation and grey employment market have managed to get some dream career related volunteership. This life is unpaid- but I have my "trustfund" (my own savings I worked for), a set of modern tools for any western situation and free libraries/workspaces for writing and life admin, free hostel leftover food and a keep-cup to sip my morning coffee from as a stroll around the city canals, its artwork and flowers. This life is safe. Be grateful for that. I try to numb myself for sanity and focus on that, as the bombs go off in other lands, as children are crying over the bodies of their loved ones, cradeling themselves with the last two limbs they have left, I try, for my own sanity, to turn off the images, focus on my coffee flavoured ice-cream from the small family busines...
Post a Comment
Read more