I try to understand you and my own effect on you so that I can support you as a friend, forgive you as a partner, and paint a truthful picture in my heart and head. That leads me to the part where I do it for me, my well-being, my view on us and outlook towards the future people I may meet- I try to understand you (and me) so that I can see you and us as we were and are, but erase the possible monster that I see when things get dark, I try to shine in the light that is all. I can heal the fearful doubt for others that arises in me, to not paint them over so relentlessly. They deserve that just as much as you and me.
Forgive yourself, lets start with that. Anxiety can (and will) at times make us act all out of whack I used to pray; do not do this to me again. Whatever you do- do not let me stumble off towards the edge. But you will stumble, that is a fact, so forgive yourself for falling way off track. Find those around you who agree to communicate- not say what they do not mean and then leave the truth unsaid-causing you to sprint towards the edge. The edge gave you answers, truths that were left unsaid. It extinguished the feeling of hopelessness. The what ifs, whys and fear of losing the shots you do not take, the ticking construct of the little time that is left. Tick-tock, knock-knock and you find yourself unhinged. Tick-tock, knock-knock you realize the spin. Tick-tock, knock-knock, mortification creeping in. Deep breaths darling You are not mad Deep breaths darling The right people will want to understand Deep breaths darling I will hold your ha...
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